A llama writes archive

Marden's Diary 19-12-12

 

Embarrassed myself the other day.  The 12 of us (6 girls and 6 boys) have been knocking about in Oak Field for a spell.  The path from Oak Field up to the barn takes us right past my boyfriend Pharaoh’s field.  He’s gorgeous.  What’s a girl supposed to do?  Go visit the boy!  Not all that easy to visit, as our people like to supervise our affair which is a bit dull of them.  They insist on haltering me and walking me to my boy’s field where they halter him and monitor our meetings.  I ask you!  I’m two and half!!

 

But, there are ways around our people.  My good ol’ uncle Silbury taught me how to get my way.  Just wait till the two-legs aren’t looking, do something naughty, and then try and blame someone else.  Ha-ha.

 

Again, But, – it doesn’t always work.  Hmmm.  I wanted to jump into Pharaoh’s field and, well, you know…. But I got a little bit too excited at the last moment and jumped the wrong fence.  I ended up stuck between two fences our people have put up to allow trees to grow without us llamas nibbling them.  Well, sorry, people, but we now know how to get at the tasty tree-lets.

 

I’ve actually got a terrific spring in my legs and jumping comes very naturally to me.  You may remember that when I was a very little llama I jumped into Pharaoh’s field to say ‘Hi’.  This time I messed up and ended in no-Marden’s land.  One of the things you two legs find so ‘endearing’ about us is that we come over all concerned when one of us does something stupid, or injures herself, or just ends up in the wrong ol’ place at the wrong ol’ time.

 

Ringsbury and Moai spent some time kushed next to me, but a desire for hay overtakes even the staunchest of supporters and towards late evening they wandered off to the shelter of the barn.

 

I had to spend the whole night out in the hardest frost of the winter.  Cor!  It was cold.  And just me at minus a million degrees or whatever.  My back was so frosted the next day.  Our slow people took a good while to realise I was missing – can’t count 12 llamas in one go, poor loves – but eventually they realised I was stuck in the tree nursery and came to get me.  They’re mean – they had a good laugh at me, and all because I was embarrassed and challenging.  Not really challenging you understand, but having been caught out I needed to assert my authority again so broadsided them, broadsided Pharaoh and generally made myself as big as possible.  They were kind to bring me a hay net, mind you, and I tucked in whilst they set about dismantling the fence so they could re-unite me with the rest of the gang.  The two-legs realised I’d jumped in, so only took a couple of rails off the fence.  Now haltered (they didn’t want me running of, I guess), I followed our people down the hedge line and pinged myself over the fence rails.  Rather than go straight back to the herd, I explained I’d like to go and give Pharaoh a darned good snort and final broadside before I trotted off.  He looked quite put out – I expect he thought he was my boyfriend!

 

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